Dealing with our Past: Relational Patterns Pt 2 – Week of 2/6-2/12

DEBRIEF QUESTIONS

1. Were you able to identify a few relational patterns in your family of origin? Was it difficult to do? Why or Why not? Were you able to see how any of those patterns have affected you?

2. What do you think was helpful about identifying an attachment style?

3. If you’re able, share one thing from your life and family history that was evil, but that God has used for good. And how?

4. Did you experience any “aha” moments or breakthroughs?

5. What was your experience processing some of these things through the prayer and scripture prompts?

EXERCISES (OPTIONAL)

For each of these exercises allow yourself 20-25 minutes of dedicated time (you can use more if needed or desired). To get going with each of them, start with our abiding framework from the fall:

1. Put away your phone or any other distractions, settle into your time/place

2. “Breathing prayer”: this is meant to help us slow down and disconnect from distractions

3. “Abide”: God has given followers of Jesus the Holy Spirit. Abiding is acknowledging and tuning our own heart and mind into the reality that God is here with us in this moment.

EXERCISE ONE

• Take a few minutes to read through the work you did in Week One.

• As you review exercises 1-3 from week 1, acknowledge the truth of what you are experiencing, feeling or thinking and write them down.

• Take time to share these things (without censorship) in writing with the Father. These can be thoughts or feelings about the moments of trauma, redemption, or the Father. Be sure to make some space to listen in silence as well.

• Close this exercise by reading and meditating on Isaiah 43:16-21

Thus says the Lord, who makes a way in the sea, a path in the mighty waters, who brings forth chariot and horse, army and warrior; they lie down, they cannot rise, they are extinguished, quenched like a wick:

“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.  The wild beasts will honor me, the jackals and the ostriches, for I give water in the wilderness, rivers in the desert, to give drink to my chosen people, the people whom I formed for myself that they might declare my praise.

EXERCISE 2

• Take a few minutes to read through the work you did for Week 1, Exercise 4.

• If you didn’t complete this exercise the first time around, take some time to go back and do it.

• If you completed this exercise previously, start here.

• Take a few minutes to review the list of sins you carry forward in your own life. Acknowledge the truth of what you are experiencing, feeling or thinking as you review them and write it down.

• Take time to share these things (without censorship) in writing with the Father. Be sure to make some space to listen in silence as well.

• If you haven’t already, spend some time in prayer over each item on the list. Make time to confess

these before the Father, asking God for forgiveness or asking for and receiving His grace.

• Close this exercise by reading and meditating on these two passages:

John 3:16-17

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.

Isaiah 61:1-3. Remember that Jesus is the fulfillment of this promise:

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning,and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.

EXERCISE 3

• Take a few minutes to read through exercises 1-2 from week 2.

• As you review these exercises, acknowledge the truth of what you are experiencing, feeling or thinking and write them down. If you are able, identify which patterns elicit which feelings/thoughts.

• If you find yourself overwhelmed, use this coping skills resource as needed. Don’t hesitate to reach out to someone in your community or contact someone one this list of local therapists and counselors.

• If you are able, take time to share these things (without censorship) in writing with the Father. Be sure to make some space to listen in silence as well.

• Close this exercise by reading and meditating on Ephesians 1:3-8

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight…

QUICK NOTES

  • You can listen to the podcast again here: PODCAST
  • Additional resources (sample genogram, digital guide and workbook, relevant reading, list of local counselors, and coping skills), can be found HERE.

Content adapted from practicingtheway.org